HABIT ENERGY

“Your beliefs become your thoughts, 
Your thoughts become your words, 
Your words become your actions, 
Your actions become your habits, 
Your habits become your values, 
Your values become your destiny”

Gandhi

Okay. I hear ya, Man.

I think I always knew that somehow but didn’t break it down to everyday life until recently.

A few weeks ago I picked up Tiny Habits: The Small Changes That Change Everything by BJ Fogg.

It’s been transformative, y’all.

As someone who’s coming out of a lifetime of trauma, I struggle hard with subtlety. I have a tendency to tell myself that I have to go big or go home. So my behavior historically has swung wildly between all in and not at all. It makes life really chaotic.

I didn’t start recognizing this about myself until last summer. I found myself at a bar with a man who was over IT at a major tech company. He said something to me that I’ll never forget. “We take the polarized results out of the equation. We factor in the reviews with between 2 - 4 stars because they are subjective. If someone gives a 1 or 5 star review clearly it’s likely an emotional decision and won’t help us grow.”

Damn. I have been thinking about that for months.

A few months ago I started taking yoga classes to help with that. It’s really helping me reconnect with my body and making me appreciate the beauty in simplicity. It helps me see that gentle movements everyday are just as powerful as sweeping grand gestures.

When I started reading Tiny Habits, I committed to a series of tiny changes in my daily schedule. Water before coffee. Gratitude before everything. Breathing deeply before reacting. All little things that anyone can do.

Feeling inspired, I set up hourly reminders on my phone via the Plum Village app to come back to my breathing. Each time the bell sounds I take a minute to come back to my breathing and reconnect with myself. It’s been a nice habit that reminds me of my grandparents. They had grandfather clocks that chimed every hour on the hour. They served as a constant reminder of the passing of time. Now the bell reminds me how lucky I am to be right here right now.

For the past few weeks, I’ve been reading Fidelity by Thich Nhat Hanh at night. It’s all about creating healthy relationships that last. The passage I read this morning talked about habit energy. Specifically how the habits we have are all connected. Sometimes our reactions are to something that happened today and sometimes they are reactions to things that happened in previous generations. Healing generational trauma is heavy on my mind right now so that was resonant. I realized I still have a lot of bad habit energy I’m carrying around.

Looking at the big picture and trying to “fix” everything isn’t going to work for me anymore.

So I’m shifting focus and surrendering to the universe.

Habit energy is my focus for 2020.

Dialing in on little things I can control.

Drinking water before coffee. Eating an orange every day. Thirty minutes of moving my body every day. Deep breathing before speaking. Considering if what I’m saying adds value before saying it. Asking myself if an action will make me feel good before doing it. Saying affirmations in the mirror at every chance.

My words for the year are “Surrender” and “Subtlety”.

I’m learning to be gentle, trust the universe & show myself the consideration I show others.

What are you focused on this year?

XO,

Christina

PS Check out this beautiful Dharma Talk by my boy Thich Nhat Hanh on transforming habit energy.